before i get to the meat of this post, i just want to apologize to all my fellow bloggers. i haven't had the chance to read or comment on blogs for the last couple of weeks. i'm hoping to go on a blog binge tomorrow. hopefully, i'll be caught up soon!
now to the post...
i received an anonymous comment regarding my ex-factor post. at first when i read the comment, i was insulted, but now i believe this person is playing devil's advocate. judging by some of the questions, this person doesn't know me well and has probably never had a one-on-one or heart-to-heart conversation with me... when i have heart-to-heart conversations with my close friends, many times it's one-sided. one-sided meaning, i allow them to pour his or her heart out and i mainly listen. it's not that i don't want to share details about my life, i'm simply a private person resulting from getting burned back in high school. it forever changed my outlook in revealing details of my life - lesson learned and lesson carried forward in my life.
instead of publishing this anonymous' comment, i've decided to write an entry about their questions, just in case you too may be questioning me... see below my answers in purple.
Anonymous has left the following comment on my post "the ex-factor":
Do you think it's fair for you to be with someone while still having feelings for another?
Do you think it's fair for you to be with someone while still having feelings for another?
to be honest, it probably isn't. but i know there are people out there in a marriage or in a relationship (a happy one) and still have feelings for someone else. this doesn't mean he/she doesn't have stronger feelings for the person he/she is currently with. it IS possible to have feelings for more than one person simultaneously. i'm living proof that it's possible.
Did you take some satisfaction that your ex texted you?
i'm not gonna lie, of course i did! who wouldn't?! so yes, i was somewhat satisfied when my ex texted me! he threw me to the curb! and now i know he thinks of me and compares me to other girls after me.
Do you think you're using your current bf? Or are your feelings sincere?
i know i'm not using my current boyfriend. i enjoy spending every minute with him. i see him everyday. every touch and even when he accidentally touches me, gives me goosebumps and i physically feel a tingle throughout my whole body. the thought of him makes me smile and the minute we leave each other, i already i want to see him again. i know my feelings are sincere.. not any guy can make me feel this way...
Do you think your current relationship has a future?
at this very moment, i would say yes because we are very happy and in the honeymoon phase. but in reality he's 8 years younger than me. even though i live this part of my life on the fly, i know in my heart, eventually i would like to get married and "maybe" have children. he probably doesn't want these things for quite some time. even though i may not want these things right now, he probably doesn't want them until years after i do...
Why do you separate your relationship from your friends? Do you have something to hide?
Why do you separate your relationship from your friends? Do you have something to hide?
no, i don't have anything to hide. as mentioned in the beginning of this post, i'm a private person. without going into too much detail, back in high school i mentioned (once) who i was going on a date with and then everything blew up in my face. at that moment, i vowed to never mention too many details of my love life. it's for the better i keep this to myself until i'm certain i'm comfortable with revealing that part of my world. my terms, always.
Do you know what you want from your life?
does anyone truly know what they want from life? if they do, do they really get what they want? just because people may know what they want from life, doesn't mean they will get it.
i know certain things i want from life, but i don't know everything i want... i know i want a good job that i enjoy. i know i want to be surrounded by good, loving people. i know eventually i want to be married and maybe have children... at this time, i'm not certain i really do want children. like i said, i know some things i want from life, but not everything. ultimately, i just want to be happy.
What are you going to do when you encounter your ex again with or without your current bf?
if you read my comments from my last post, if he pulls the same crap again, i'm gonna call him on it... he told me he didn't want to be friends. so why is he speaking to me as though we are? i really can't give you a definite answer for this question, i can't predict the future.
If I had to read between the lines in your post, I think you're tempted by your ex despite knowing how destructive he could be to you.
yea, i very well know he's destructive. hence why i made the conscious decision to leave him in the past. what makes you think i'm tempted though? did you conclude this because if you were in the same situation you would be tempted? i guess in these circumstances many people would be tempted. yes, my ex texted me that it was good to see me and i was his best sex, but this doesn't mean the feeling is mutual.
 |
| (via) |
6 comments:
wow. that is a mighty long interview question for an anonymous post! girl, the cancerians that we are (and of course only one day a part and the same year, too!), i can understand with being a private person. anyway, i think the questions were legitimate, but sometimes i wish people wouldn't do it in a blog, especially if you think they're someone you know in real life.
just like that ex from the ice age who kept commenting anonymously on my blog and then all of a sudden rehashes the past. it's been like 10 years, i haven't spoken to him and after all he said on the comment section, he requests to follow me on twitter. WTF. that is why the bloggy blog no longer lets anonymous comments published. ha ha ha
to ren's point, interesting questions from an anon reader. i guess inquiring minds want to know! :D
to be honest, i don't think anyone of us thinks or thought you were "using" your new man. sometimes we need to be with other people who are completely different from an ex to show us that there's more out there than the one we are stuck thinking about. do what makes you happy; if 26er is part of that happiness, go with it and enjoy every moment!
I applaud you for sharing your life(to an extent). It always amazes me how each person seems to share the same problems yet face a completely different set of circumstances.
This was my first time coming across your site and I must say it was fun.
I don''t know what to say to that. I would be pissed. You can't help, but feel what you feel. I'm in a similar situation and even though I still have strong feelings for my ex, I would never go back out with him, but doesn't mean my feels stop for him.
First off, only people who experience this, only understand what I'm (or we are) saying.
I've had anonymous commenters on my blog. Some were nice. Some were not so nice. It concerned me that someone(s) out there were reading my thoughts and giving their own thoughts on mine but didn't disclose their identity. That led me to locking my blog.
I don't know, Maur. This anonymous commenter could be someone you know or could be a complete stranger. It could be someone who is mad at you, someone who doesn't know you well or someone who just wants to stir the pot.
What's really important is how you handle this situation. Someone will always have something to say about everything. Live your life the way you want as long as you're not hurting anyone.
It was nice meeting 26er. He seems to make you happy. You seem happy (even J said so). Don't let these things get to you.
I am not going to write a novel this time but I think the anonymous poster asked fair questions and I think you handled and answered each one truthfully and much thought.
I know that one of the questions stemmed from my comment that I never met your last boyfriend. And it never bothered me, I know you and I know you keep certain things private. But I am thankfully that you let me meet your current boyfriend. Like you said, you will do certain things when you are ready and I know it's not because you are ashamed of anything or have something to hide.
At the end of the day, your happiness is all that matters.
Post a Comment