oh boy, looks like i'm sick. don't think it's full blown yet. just a burning sore throat and little cough. no fever. but i don't want it to get worse than this. so it looks like i'll be cooped up at home all weekend and this is something i don't know how to do... no UFC watching at Pam's, no Hot Stepper 15th anniversary party featuring Caron Wheeler from Soul II Soul, no visiting cutie little baby boy Kai, Jenn and Jay. NO WEEKEND NOTHING. it's just me, myself and i.
i'm already going stir crazy. thinking, hmmmmmm... maybe it is possible to go out tonight? but i know i shouldn't. i think i wouldn't feel this way if i actually lived with someone. living by yourself can get really lonely.
in boredom comes too much thinking and many randoms and with that comes this blog post. here's some of my tid bits and randoms...
"People say that bad memories cause the most pain, but it's the good ones that actually drive you insane."
- this saying is exactly why it's taking me forever to get over the last ex. even the tiniest things remind me of him. how do i get over him if even the smallest of things make me think of our good times together?
"you will have your heart broken more than once and it's harder everytime."
- are you effing kidding me? the next time is going to hurt more than this? f*ck me!
- (fyi, stole this saying from one of Reni's blog post. which can be found here.)
currently repeated on youtube (i'd listen to these songs on itunes or my iphone, but i don't have them):
"only girl (in the world)" by Rihanna
"teenage dream" by Katy Perry
so i made plans for Wednesday to hang with a past love of my life... do you think this is crazy??? him and i were never really together for 3 years and i believe it took me 4 years to get over him. but i swear i wouldn't make plans with him if i wasn't over him. and I SWEAR I AM! i don't think of him and when he contacts me, i don't care and i forget to call or text him back. to be honest, i'm thinking of bailing on him.
"i'll let karma take care of you for me."
LOL! i so can't wait for this day. oh and i know it will come...
i was right! i don't know how to stay home. spoke to Pam recently... looks like i'm going to her place tonight to get some vitamins and watch UFC then head over to the Hot Stepper party with her hubby and friends. besides, i don't think i'm really that sick... i think...
i have all of tomorrow to recuperate if need to anyway. HA!
4 comments:
girl, i think if we don't learn from the past then it gets harder every time.
so what if it's taking you long to get over the ex. everyone has their own pace. follow your own. don't let anyone tell you otherwise. it's your own business to begin with. it's better that you're sure than pretending that you're over him by living life in the fast lane.
that's why you have friends in the first place. do what you gotta do. ignore those that judge.
you can do it! xo
Reni: yup, you're definitely right! I won't lie to myself and pretend that he's not on my mind... Gotta take it at my own pace. It'll happen... Eventually... Until then I'm just gonna do my thing but enjoy it while I do it even though there's still some pain in my heart...
Hope you're enjoying your weekend! :)
Love hurts. I have only had my heartbroken once and it was shattered into pieces. It took me over a year to bounce back. Luckily though, I learned my lesson from that relationship and made sure that I didn't bring baggage from it or make the same mistakes in the next relationship.
BTW - I also love Rihanna's Only Girl song too!
Leesh: you bring up a very good point! it's more than important to make sure baggage from the past isn't brought in the next relationship.
P.S. i'm ADDICTED to that Only Girl song!
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